Q: Why don't mummies ever take a day off?
A: They don't like to unwind.
Q: What happens to Egyptian ladies who don't take, um, precautions?
A: They become mummies!
Q: Where do mummies go for a swim?
A: To the dead sea!
Q: What is the most important day in Egypt?
A: Mummy’s Day!
Q: What kind of girl does a mummy take on a date ?
A: Any old girl he can unwrap!
Q: Why do mummies have trouble keeping friends?
A: They’re too wrapped up in themselves!
Q: Why were ancient Egyptian children confused?
A: Because their daddies were mummies!
Q: What kind of music do mummies like most?
A: Wrap music!
Q: What is mummy’s favourite kind of coffee?
A: De-coffin-ated!
Q: How do you use an ancient Egyptian doorbell?
A: Toot-and-come-in!
Q: What do you get if you cross an Egyptian mummy with a car mechanic?
A: Toot and Car Man!
Q: What do you call a mummy who wins the lottery?
A: A lucky stiff!
Q: What did the sign in the Egyptian funeral home say?
A: “Satisfaction guaranteed or double your mummy back!”
Q: What kind of underwear does a mummy wear?
A: Fruit of the Tomb!
Q: What did ancient Egyptian postman say to a boy?
A: “Hey, fellow, is your mummy home?”
Q: What is the mummy’s favorite musical program?
A: Name that tomb!
Q: What is the mummy’s favorite flower?
A: Chrysanthamummies!
Q: What was the mummies’ vacation like?
A: Nobody knows. They were too wrapped up to tell us!
Q: Why was the mummy so tense?
A: He was all wound up!
Q: Why don’t mummies have hobbies?
A: They are too wrapped up in their work!
Q: Why was Tutankhamun coffin’?
A: Because it was damp in his Tomb!
Q: Why couldn’t the mummy come outside?
A: Because he was all wrapped up!
Q: What did the Mummy movie director say when the final scene was done?
A: Ok, that’s a wrap!
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